January 2011
my partners ex has started being abusive wat can i do?
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05/01/2011 : at 1st my partners ex was amicable she ended their relationship & has another partner she was cheating with at the time b4 they separated but as time has gone on & she sees how happy he is she has started being awkward by not letting him have access to the kids. Recently she contacted me on face book thru 1 of her kids fb having blocked her own account being abusive about my own kids thats she knows nothing about i may add & my natural reaction is to let my acid tongue rip my partner wants me to ignore her but its eating away at me & feel like she can say wat she likes & im unable to return my own opinion of her as i refuse to do it on her kids fb page can sum1 please advise me i want to put her in her place without behaving like her
What should i do about my problematic Ex?
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07/01/2011 : my ex and i started great as friends, our relationship that grew was great too. we were together for 9 and a bit months. we were very close and i got a bit obsessed about him. we were both very much in love (or what we supose was) he said he couldnt live without me. i felt the same. then. he dumped me in august. we are no longer friends. it was a messy ending. every time i have tried to talk to him - as we go to the same school - he seems to hurt me more. he is difficult to talk to and is very stubborn.
i told him i missed him (by text) and he said 'we both know that is a lie and that you actually dont'. this was true, i do miss him. i have to mention that despite still having feelings for him, i feel good and happy without him. i feel ready to move my life on. the text i sent him was on new years eve. it was my way of getting everything from the past year off my chest. but as usual it turned into an argumnet. and now he thinks something that is completely untrue. i wont take him back i know that.
as we go to the same school it has caused a few problems rumours being started and awkwardness. he has texted me things but not done them e.g. if you dont reply i will ask you at school. but he hasnt. today he seemed to have a problem with me looking over at him, really just a casual glance asd we hang out quite close. he asked my friend why i did, why cant he ask me? i sometimes catch him looking at me with a guy friend, he admitted being jealous of him hugging me a month ago (that was what started the rumours).
Sometimes i just find him looking at me, moody, depressed, puppyeyed almost. i would like to see what people think of my situation please. it would be nice to see what others think of it. thanks.
what should I do about the other girl?
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10/01/2011 : I have been with my boyfriend for 3 years and we are getting married in October, however last year I had to go abroad for a couple of months as part of my job. recently I have discovered an email between my boyfriend and a girl living in our area he says at the end of his message "can't wait to see you again" what should I do??
Is my relationship worth saving?
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12/01/2011 : I have been dating my boyfriend for over 3 years now. We dated for 5 months before, broke up for 4, then he asked me out again and we started dating again. It has been a very good relationship until about 6 months ago. Before, he was in college for the first 2 years of our relationship and I was in high school. Now we both go to the same college. We are both very busy with classes, and he is a workaholic working as many days as he can, which is fine with me because he has so many bills to pay (car payment, insurance, rent, etc.
). We saw/see each other on Saturday every week and he stays the night with me every Saturday night. We do not have sex, and haven't since we started dating because I want to wait till we are married. Lately, he has been blowing me off a lot easier, not calling as much, not texting as much, and just doesn't seem to be wanting to try in our relationship. He even tried to blow me off on my birthday for a little while to play video games with friends, but ended up spending it with me when I told him I'd break up with him if I wasn't more important to him than that.
We have taken a week long break recently and decided to give it another go, but I am scared we are going to slide back into the same rut we were in. The day we got back together, we had a great time. But just yesterday he informed me that I wasn't invited to go on a trip with him and his friends (one of whom is his best friend's girlfriend) because his best friends don't like me and haven't. Which I am aware of and understand why they don't, but he said I wasn't invited because the trip would be awkward.
Is this fair? I feel like I should be more important to him to be invited one things such as these no matter his friends' feelings (his other friends love me, only his best friend and best friend's girlfriend don't like me). I feel like there is an underlying reason for him treating me this way because he insists we have a future together and he doesn't want to break up. I don't want to break up, but I want to be happier with him like we were before. I'm not sure what changed... What should I do?
Should I take my ex-boyfriend after a two year split?
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12/01/2011 : Recently my ex-boyfriend contacted one of my friends to tell them that he still loves me and that he should of married me but I don't know if I should take him back. He was the one that broke up with me and now he says I'm the only one for him. What should I do? Should I talk to him when he calls?
My step-dad's threat left me turned on, how can I manage the feelings?
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12/01/2011 : My step-dad’s threat left me turned on. I felt sexually aroused after my step-dad threatened to ‘paddle my bottom’. I'm nearly 15 and think I'm too old for the paddle, but he’s from America and thinks nothing of punishing me or my sister with it. He’s quite a bit younger than my mum and pretty good looking. However, when my mum met him I despised him for a long time. But recently I’ve been looking at him kinda different. It all sort of exploded a couple of weeks ago and during an argument I was having with my mum, he said if I didn’t put a lid on it, he take me upstairs and paddle my bottom.
This immediately sent a shiver right through to my groin and I went bright red and felt myself quivering with excitement. I was so turned on, I thought I’d wet my pants. I managed to walk away without a paddling but I can’t help wishing he’d gone through with it. I’ve hated the spankings I’ve had from him in the past and I don’t understand what’s changed. I’m so embarrassed and horrified about the feelings I had at the time. It’s not like I fancy him (I’ve got a boyfriend) that would be weird, but recently I’ve been fantasising about him spanking me with the paddle and doing other sexual things.
I think I’ve got a crush on him now. This is really bad, I can’t talk to my mum about it or even my friends at school, but the feelings won’t go away. What should I do? will the feelings about him go away? I feel trapped and can't stop thinking about it.
Is my partner bay?
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14/01/2011 : We have dated for a year and he says he loves me, treats me good, a little affectionate, hugs and embraces, but not much sex and no kissing. He is 60 and never been married or not too many relationships with women. He LOVES the company of MEN, but while I am with him. He has no feminine features nor mannerisms.
What should I do about all my guy friends?
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15/01/2011 : I have a lot of guy friends and all of them see me as a sister which kinda sucks. I'm interested in 2 of my best friends but both already told me that they see me as a sister and that we're too much alike.. They told me I'm attractive and cool. I don't want them to see me that way anymore. I dont get it. What can I do? How can I get them jealous?
What should I do about my depressive ex?
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18/01/2011 : Recently my ex boyfriend and i broke up because he felt that due to his depression, he needed to concentrate on himself for a while and couldn't deal with a relationship. We had argued a lot and so I agreed just wanting him to be happy. We're only 16 and go to the same school and have taken nearly all the same subjects (not on purpose). He said he still loves me and that we'd still be close yet all he's been doing is avoiding spending time with me. He's kind and civil when he has to be but has declined every time I invite him out and makes no effort to see me, and makes it clear that he's avoiding me.
I don't want to make his self esteem go any lower by confronting him about it because I know all we do is argue. I want him back so badly because he's the best thing that's happened to me and I feel like the crazy obsessed ex girlfriend because he doesnt show the same affection back. Should I confront him about it and risk losing him as a friend and also risk making his depression worse or should I just leave things as they are knowing that we'll only distance ourselves further?
I suffer from depression and being bullied at work
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18/01/2011 : I work in a professional job and understand that I am required to work to a very high standard. I have suffered from depression for over 2 years very badly. I honestly believe that my performance is not sub standard but my boss is constantly complaining about my work. I have recently had a disciplinary and went through the bosses concerns. I agree that I made a couple of mistakes (about 3 instances where clients were not kept up to date as much as they should) but the rest I disagree with. I only work 2 days a week and find the amount of work impossible to cope with.
For over the last year I've been working on my days off from home, taking calls from clients on my mobile etc but nothing seems to please my boss. I have exceeded my targets by about 40% for last year and when I raised this at my disciplinary my boss simply said the targets were too low (they're standard for the industry) and upped them to about 10% less than the target of a full member of staff making it impossible to obtain. She shouted so loud in the disciplinary that the rest of the firm heard as well as people not connected with the firm.
Since then she seems to be picking every little mistake I make up. Today she rang me on my day off and shouted at me for 10 minutes. Because of my depression I have very little self confidence and constantly worry about my performance, hence why I do work on my day off etc. However I know feel like I'm being bullied and can't face going into work tomorrow to be shouted at again. I spoke to a colleague today who heard the boss shouting at me and she said I was being bullied. It's a very small firm so there is no one above my boss to discuss the matter with.
The procedure lists her as the first port of call. Simply don't know what else to do and it's making me suicidal.
what should i do about a partner who just wont except its over so uses our son to bully me?
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21/01/2011 : My partner and i have been split for 6 months now and we have a 11 month old son together. He never excepted its over and i'm constantly receiving texts begging me to take him back. I have to remind him of why we split, which being he was abusive towards me both mentally and physically. He sees our son 4 times a week but wants to see him at my home everyday which i find a bit much due to the nature of our split. So then a get a string of abuse of him telling me he wants full custody of our son and threatening never to bring him back when he has our son.
I find this all very distressing and am taking medication for depression as a result. I find myself having to be nice to him even when he's abusive to me just so he wont take our son!Every day a get a barrage of texts and if a dont reply a get accused of being with other men which is indeed the last thing on my mind. All this is getting me down and a really dont know where a stand legally or where to turn! Can anyone offer any advice please?
I want to have my baby son stop overnights what are my rights?
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21/01/2011 : my son is 12month old a see him 3 times a week. A want to start having him sleep over at mine but my expartner wont allow it. She said he is too clingy and wont settle sleeping over yet. Which a dont agree with. I live with my parents and currently sleeping on their setee as a do not have a place of my own which my ex also throws at me saying there is not any room for our son sleep. But we would make room. I want take her court to get equal custody but am told a wont get it has she has had baby since birth? Is she right ? Would court me costly?
how should I do this?
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22/01/2011 : I went on our computer and discovered my boyfriend had accidentally left his email account logged in I didn't intend to read any of his emails but one caught my eye it's from a website called f**k book and had a picture of a womans breasts askin if he wants to chat! as I saw this I checked other messages and discovered he is a member of lots of dating websites, what should I do??
Is my partner turning Bi because he now using a vibrator up his anus?
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26/01/2011 : When we first dated he swore he hated gay ppl now 7yrs later he's introduced dildo's & vibrators into our sex life casual sex no longer exhists we now have extreme porn films & sextoy relations with each other.
i have a friend who loves a beggar but he is afraid to convince his parents that he wants to get married. what should he do?
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26/01/2011 : i have a friend who loves a begger but he is afraid to convinvce his parents that he wants to get married. what should he do?