March 2012
Should I stay at a job I hate just because everyone thinks I should?
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04/03/2012 : I have been at my job for the last 18 month and am coming to the end of my contract. My work is now telling me that they want me to fill a permanent position (which would be a promotion and more money). Everyone I have spoken to is telling me that I should go for it, and people at work are telling me I'd be stupid not too. I know the current job situation is not a good one, but I have always wanted to go abroad. I don't particularly enjoy my job or get on with the people I work with, but I don't want to let people down or people to be disappointed with me if I don't decide to stay.
I am worried however, if I do leave and go abroad like I want will I ever get a chance like this again - to work for a good organisation with good prospects. If I stayed I could afford a car, to move out maybe even a house in a couple of years. I know it is the right thing to do, but I can't help but just feel that it's really not what I want. I am torn with my decision - please help!
Do I really Like Her?
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11/03/2012 : Basically ive known this girl for about 6 months now. She has been living on my street all my life however i didnt know till i first met her. Anway we both go to the same college and we spend time together in our frees. I think i might quite like her however i doubt she feels the same way. She used to talk to me about her ex before however now it seems she has moved on. The other day she said to me that she quite liked another guy however just like a little crush. I pretended not to really be bothered but in reality it did actualy hurt to know that.
Ive been thinking about that since she's said it and i cant really get it out of my mind. I dont really know what to do about it? Any Advice?? :/
Twitter cheating
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14/03/2012 : My partner is writing to other girls on twitter calling them sexy and telling them that they are georgous and getting responses from the same girls. I found out and am hurt and upset as he did this to me a year ago and promised that he wouldn't do it again. He also lied about it and said it wasnt his account at first then admitted that it was his and he was just flirting its not cheating. Should I let this go or the fact he hid it and promised that he wouldn't hurt me like this again and then a year later did this again - should I just get rid?
Am I right to mistrust my husband?
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15/03/2012 : I have been married for 3 months however I have been unable to trust my partner completely since one month before the wedding. Having been in a relationship where I was right to mistrust a partner, I think that I might be looking too deep into situations, reading the facts wrong or jumping to conclusions. I used to trust him completely, however when I returned from a month away I discovered he had been looking at an online dating site. I confronted him and he evaded the question so I ped it.
Then I found out he was messaging an ex girlfriend and organising to meet up in the daylight, however I am not sure if this happened. I now scour his internet history and find that he erases certain parts, rather than the whole history. This makes me suspicious. Through my suspicions, I counted our condoms (we no longer use them). On counting 1 month later there were some missing. We had used one. I confronted my husband and he swears he doesn't know what happened to them. I also checked his phone and noted that he has ively d messages from one male friend, and I am not sure if he has from others.
This is a problem for me as we met overseas in his home country and I am not a resident yet. I have no intention to stay in the country if I am not with him, yet my whole life is now here. I have no family or friends here to turn to. Am I reading too far into things? Everytime I try to talk to him about something specific he shrugs it off, we fight, or I let it go.
What do I do about my Childish ex-partner?
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16/03/2012 : OK, long story. I've been with my now ex-girlfriend 9 years. We have 2 beautiful children together. In that time she's cheated on me with 3 different men, I cheated on her with one woman (a long time ago). The latest infidelity is the one that broke us up, she'd been with another man for a YEAR, and then came home one day and told me and said that it was over. That was in November last year. Since then we continued to live together, which was not a healthy situation. In January, she started a new relationship with a man ten years older than me, and already she is pregnant with his baby.
In February, I met a wonderful woman who has completely blown me away, she's everything the ex wasn't, and amazingly good to me. So things seemed to be on the up. Then I ruined it all by getting arrested and bailed and not allowed to go home, or see my children. Not clever, I know. So I spent a week on a friend's couch before finding my own flat, and now life is a million times better. Except for one thing. I can't even SPEAK to my children. I rang to speak to them and my ex told me that Social Services said I shouldn't have any contact whatsoever.
I took her word for it. On a friend's advice, I decided to call SS myself and check it out. They confirmed they had said NO SUCH THING. So I rang again and asked to speak to my daughter, the ex said no. I told her I knew she was lying, she said she wasn't. I checked again with Social Services, and they confirmed AGAIN that they hadn't said any such thing. I answer bail next week, so hopefully will only get a caution and be able to go back to the house (Technically I'm still a tenant there), but just don't know how to deal with someone so childish anymore.
Can anyone advise how best to deal with this? Really don't want to drag the kids through court, but unless someone has a suggestion, it might be exactly what I'll have to do.
Why did he ask me out, then end it so soon?
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21/03/2012 : I've liked this guy a while and he said things like he liked me back etc I then asked him out on Valentines but he never replied and so I thought he just didn't know how respond and didn't want to hurt my feelings by saying no.. A month later he asked me out and I said yes, we had been going out for just under a week/a few days and it seemed like it was going pretty well, until he messaged me saying 'we have nothing in common..' He said that he did want to go out with me anymor because of this, (when in a way he hadn't fully given me a chance to show my full colours, because I'm kinda of shy and he seemed shy-ish around me too.
.?) After talking I excepted that he didn't want to go out with me anymor and he message saying its 'nothing wrong with you..' I see him looking at me sometimes, but I'm not sure if he's looking at me looking at him (because I still like him and sometimes I do..) or looking at me because he likes me? I just wanted to know what he ment and if 'we have nothing in common..' is some kind of code for something or just we have nothing in common, so I don't know what to talk about with you etc? I'm confused on his actions.
. Please Help, Thanks
Why do I not feel I can relax in my relationship?
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23/03/2012 : My girlfriend and I have been together for over a year - although we have only spent around 6 months of that together as she is currently studying on the other side of the world for university. this is each of our first proper relationship and we fell head over heels in love. unfortunately, our relationship hit a tricky patch where both of us cheated with other people, in quite a serious way but all incidetns happened over a period of around a month and were mainly due to alcohol and feleing lonley.
we had some tough times but we both still loved and cared for the other person very much so we didn't split up because we want to be together for a long time to come. i have had a hard time putting my mistakes in the relationship behind me, because of feelings of guilt, shame, and questioning how much i truly love my girlfriend, although everything insdie me tells me that we're meant to be together. there is just something niggling that i can't get rid of - i still find her very attractive, we have the same sense of humour, we never run out of conversaiton, we have same interests and i am going to visit my girlfriend on the other side of the world, yet i still worry that i won't be able to relax fully and feel like something is missing, although for the life of me i can't put my finger on what it is.
i am worried i do not see her in the same way, but not 'i don't find her attractive anymore' because i do, i feel like maybe i am not excited by her as much anymore and i don't look up to her as much as i used to. has anyone got any ideas? i am so confused but i want this relationship to work so much because i have never cared this deeply for another person..
im worried about my friend !
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29/03/2012 : Recently we have noticed in our group that one of our friends is acting differently. She doesn't eat at school and she doesn't sleep at night. Sometimes she is moody for no reason and she just talks on her phone. we have tried talking to her but she won't listen. what should we do ???!!!