Family
Results 1 - 8 of about 17
Family problems, feels like my mums just not interested?
Replies: This question has 3 responses
26/02/2010 : This sounds like a odd question but anyway... I dont know if anyone has had this with their parents before but it just seems like my mum isnt interested? For example im 14 and just going to start with all my GCSE options. I really need someone to talk to about it. I try to bring the conversation up with her by saying somthing about it like "I dont know if i should choose this or this" and she just mutters while tapping away at her laptop. She hasnt once asked me what i want to do, she never starts a conversation with me anymore, she shows no interest in coming to the school meetings or reading the booklets about the options. And this is just one of the things. I just feel like she wont talk to me about anything and she should be more interested with things about what i want to with my life? what im thinking of taking? And tomorow im choosing them and she hasnt asked me anything about them! Theres other things aswell she just never shows an interest in anything anymore, and i dont understand why? And it just seems to be me aswell. My older brother is 17 and at college studying engineering and hes doing really well, and mum couldnt be prouder of him, shes always asking him how things are going and if he needs help etc. And she did the same when he was my age aswell. When he was doing his gcses she was talking to him like evryday telling him not to worry and that he would work it out, and asking what he thought he wanted to do and about college etc. But with me nothing? My mum and dad are seperated and have been for about 10 years, but their frends. I see my dad alot in the week and weekends as he lives alone. Me and my brother always see him several times. My dad talks to me, asks me about it. I can acctually have a conversation with him! He takes me to the option evenings and i've told him about mum but he cant seem to see the problem as such cause hes not there to see it happen. I have a younger brother whose 3 aswell and ofcourse that keeps my mum busy because hes not my dads, and his dad isnt around (long story) but she gets plenty of support from others and me and my brother. I just dont understand why she doesnt show any interest? It makes me upset i feel like she couldnt care about me less all she wants to do is like tap away on facebook, until my brother walks in the room and shes ready with questions and ideas, and hes happy to tell her about college and his girlfriend etc. I've asked my mum about it, like the other day when i was trying to talk to her, she just said it was up to me so i should just go upstairs and think about it. So i was upset and agry and replied that shes just not interested and its like i have to keep saying muuum? Mummm? till i get a "huh?" or "yeah whatever"? I keep saying your just not interested are you? and when i asked for help earlier on coursework she just said i dont know? then once again my brother will come in and its like "oohhh sooo how did your teacher say your test went"? and it goes on and on until i just slip out the room and leave to my bedroom, proably unnoticed to her. I feel alone and dont like not having support, i may be more sure of what i want to do with my life then what my brother did but i would still like to talk to her about it. Dont get me wrong i love the support from my dad, hes been amazing lately as we're getting so much closer, but me and mum to be honest we dont talk at all. She only works two days a week so i should have her there the rest of the days but nothing, shes just not interested i try to tell her, and it wont work. I want her to be proud maybe of something i did, for example im a dancer and my dads been paying for it for about ten years because my mum wouldnt by the way. And i recently got invited to London to dance with the Royal Ballet and dad was estatic that it was going so well, where as mum just said "cool" do i dissapoint her? Does she not want me to dance? Im not doing that as a career, i love dancing but its my hobbie not my job. English has always been my best subject and ive won awards in it etc. So i want to work in journalism or Media. I have my mind set on things, and at the moment i cant wait to finish with school get to college and eventually be out of this town somewhere i might get some more support. I know this is alot but i just really want some help? Please?
Parents won't come to wediing
Replies: This question has 2 responses
27/01/2010 : I am about to marry my boyfriend. We went out when we were very young and then did not see each other for years. In this time I met and married someone else who I then divorced. Then I met my old flame again and now we are getting married. My parents did not like him back in the day and they say that they will not come to our wedding. It is very important that they come, how can I make them understand that it is important to me that htey come?
My Mum is senile
Replies: This question has 1 responses
25/01/2010 : My Mum is very old now. She has mild demetia. Whenever we go out she atrts making racist comments whebever we see black people or Indians I knew she always though a bit like this but now her mind is going a bit she seems determined to speak up in public. If I say anyhtiong she says I am making a fuss, but some of the things she says are really offensive.
Bad family Xmas
Replies: This question has 1 responses
02/01/2010 : I did not see my family for many years. I have just got back from spending Xmas with them and now I know why I did not go back for ages. They are horrible. The only timen they have anything to say is when they bad mouth people and they love it when things go wrong for others. There is no joy oin them at all. Is it ok just to ignore them again or am I expected to put up with it until they die?
Give Up on Mother
Replies: This question has 1 responses
23/12/2009 : My upbringing in my childhood years was hurtful from my Mom, saying things like “I wish you were never born”,“you were adopted”, “why can’t you be more like your brother” (8 years older), “why can you be more like ____” (a family friend’s child who was the same age). She claims she was a “good” mother, but any Mother who can say hurtful things like that, isn’t really a good Mother. It is obvious that I was a mistake….and she was there to remind me of it. SHE NEVER SAID ANYTHING LIKE THAT TO MY BROTHER….it was apparent growing up that she favored my brother over me. I vowed that I would never treat my children that way (I now have 4, all in their twenties) and I never did….you can crawl out of the quagmire if one chooses. Over 35 years ago, my only brother (8 years senior) was married to an overbearing woman, who demanded at that time “she will get married whenever and wherever she wants” and really had no consideration for our friends and family who may have wanted to attend the wedding at a church (she wanted to get married on a Friday by a Justice of the Peace). We suggested a Saturday, of which she flatly refused. This caused a lot of tension between my parents and her (and my brother)….this was the beginning of not so beautiful relationship. A few years later I married, and my wife and I started a family. It was around this time that my brother and his wife did not have any contact with my parents. Yet once a child was born to them, my parents welcomed them back – their first grandchild. I attempted to have a relationship with my brother, but his wife interfered with it (not inviting us to any family get togethers…however HER side of the family was always invited). For the next several years, we always had to invite ourselves to their kid’s birthday parties, and we would have to contact them to invite them to our kid’s birthday parties…..basically a one way street. I stopped phoning them one time to invite ourselves to THEIR kid’s birthday party….and they never phoned again. After having been married and having 4 children, I lost my job after 23 years, and decided to go into business (with the blessing of the bank). I asked my brother, who is a Charted Account, to look over the books of this business I was going to buy….he never got back to me, but I went ahead anyway. Due to unforeseen circumstances, two years later, we went bankrupt, and we had to go into rental housing to accommodate our family. (NOTE: My brother keeps criticizing my decision to go into business, blaming me for the bankruptcy and that I was over my head….this was far from the truth, however he never gave me any advice as I asked him BEFORE I went into business. He also has stated that no one should help me out of my dilemma). Around this time, my Dad passed away. My brother’s wife’s true colors came out, saying some hurtful things to my Mom and had no regard to what my Mom was going through at the time. Then the rental house (after 3 years) was being sold and we had to vacate, my Mom offered to help us out with purchasing another home via taking out a mortgage on her home. I accepted (ensuring that the mortgage that she took out was enough to cover her expenses for one year, giving her enough time to sell her home and payback the mortgage she took out). Then she changed her mind after a year, and had to borrow money from other friends to lessen the monthly payments. After my brother and wife snooped around her bank book (while she was in the hospital on one occasion), they confronted my Mom asking “why did you loan so much” and “did they need so much money”. It was really none of their business. Also, after my Mom helped us out she figured she “owned” me, or that I “owed” her for anything that I had to do in her (going shopping, running errands etc). I feel that I don’t owe her anything, directly due to the upbringing I received from her, but she has always given some money to us with strings attached….I should have learned. When my older brother found out about the “helping out” that my Mom did, and he and his wife accused me of taking advantage of my Mom, not leaving enough in her bank to take care of her – my brother’s wife has also said that she has NO respect for me. I did not take advantage of my Mom….It so far from the truth, and really none of my brother’s or his wife’s business. But the point to this….I received my brother’s OK when my Mom offered to help us out, ensuring his share of the inheritance would be in place, but he has conveniently forgotten this (especially in front of his overbearing and controlling wife). Now, every time that my brother sees my Mom, both he and his wife badmouth me, and my Mom does nothing to defend me…all she cares about is the amount of help she can get from my brother and his wife….not what’s right or wrong…and my Mom constantly compares my wife to my brother’s wife….how my brothers wife is a hard worker, good mother, yet forgets what ill treatment she received from her…..my Mom is more interested in how much help she receives from my brother and his wife. Just to let you know…my Mom, although mentally fit, her physical abilities to walk without assistance is non-existent, and requires a barrage of social workers coming to her home on a daily basis. To summarize: My Mom is self centered, and really only cares about who is around to help her. She will not defend me in front of my brother and wife, criticizes my wife for the lack of help she gives to my Mom. She feels that any money that was given to me and my family over the years requires a devoting to helping her out whenever she feels the need. Again…so many strings attached….never really out of the goodness of her heart. She regrets loaning the money to help purchase our home, as it has caused an unnecessary riff between her and my brother….it seems to me that she still favors my brother over me. I think my next step should be to totally give up on my Mom and brother, and carry on with my life without them. I have given up on my brother…both him and his wife has said they don’t want anything to do with me or my family….and this was before the “helping out” was discovered. What is your opinion?
My Family is not good
Replies: This question has 1 responses
02/12/2009 : My Family is not good
I hate my family
Replies: This question has 1 responses
25/11/2009 : This year I have realised that all my problems are down to the way I was brought up, none of it is down to me it is all them. I never wnat to see them but I have to go back for Xmas. Shall I tell them to stick it?
I do not want to go home.
Replies: This question has 1 responses
24/11/2009 : Hello, I am an 18 year old first year student at University on London. I have come from Cornwall to study here. I cannot afford to live in halls or anywhere else for that matter and I may have to go home after Xmas. I cannot think of any way to raise any more money. My parents are telling me to give it all up an come and work in their gift shop in Falmouth. I love them but now I have lived for a short time in London the thought of going back to live in Cornwall makes me feel sick. I have 2 questions.1 how can I raise money for my studies and 2 how do I tell my paretnts I do not want to go back without upsetting them?
Previous |
1 |
www.parentingcafe.co.uk
www.supernanny.com
www.wholefamily.com
www.ehow.com
www.saveyourmarriage.co.uk
www.relationshipexpert.co.uk